I’m getting such serious retaliation from my parental that it’s making it really unbearable to even look =.= I hate doing this just because it seems so…. high school, But I think somehow … someway, she regressed into being more traditional asian. It’s gotten to the point where everything I do is somehow related to how well I can keep a marriage. Not married btw. And I find it funny how it is no way dependent on the guy. It’s just me =.= I also have a really bad attitude where I need to go to class or something to learn better ones, I talk so very uneducated and let’s throw in I’m a disappointment and failure too! So last night I went out for a drive just to clear my head. I got a bit of bakery goods… wrote down everything that went through my mind, And had a cream puff =3 I’m lucky enough to be able to do that at least. I don’t forget how lucky I am but now it seems like since I have become this big disappointment in their lives.. they threw my back to high school.
And if my job right now — you know in service and purely selling products — wasn’t customer service enough. It looks like I might be forced to get a job in retail customer service. I guess she wants me to deal with worse people than her just to make her look like a saint. Or what she tells me often is that I need a job where I come home a just cry. And trust me, I used to do that enough just from her >.> I know how brutal the retail world can be… maybe not first hand but I’ve seen pretty crappy customers and I’m usually just watching horrified from the buying line. It’s quite sad if you see it :/ Makes you have a little less faith in the world.
I’m currently conflicted. Moving out seems unreal but very plausible. Seems like it’d just make things harder but…. it’s already getting that way so why not throw icing on the cake. If I wanted the safe route I would’ve just went with what she told me and I would be hating a CVS or something by now (pharmacy. ugh.)
I have to remember if I’m ever a parent… that if your kid is really insistent that something makes them happy, let them run with it. But always provide a back up~
But since I’m already the kid with the most unheard of disappointment in the house… might as well just keep going to where my guts take me.